The Ballad of Rand

By: Lanae Posted on: June 15, 2009

On one fine summer's night, there was a Satyr, name of Rand.

He packed up all his things and made a vow to see the land.

Though just a lad, he was intent on starting a new life,

To see the world, to see the sights, to bag himself a wife.

Well, this strapping Satyr lad, he set his eyes upon the world,

To sew his wild oats until he found the perfect girl.

His first stop was Cyrene, for he was near it all along.

He'd heard before a lovely lass, who sang a lovely song.

So Rand approached the beauty there, but once the music passed,

He saw the singer plant her lips upon another lass!

Well, this strapping Satyr lad, he set his eyes upon the world,

To sew his wild oats until he found the perfect girl.

He made his way to Ashtan, where he'd heard the girls were nice.

A woman caught his eye before he'd even seen her twice.

He asked her if she'd like to have some dinner and some wine.

She told him that she would, but there were others first in line.

Well, this strapping Satyr lad, he set his eyes upon the world,

To sew his wild oats until he found the perfect girl.

In Shallam's gates, young Rand thought he might try his luck again,

And meet a pretty desert lass, who'd like an ounce of sin.

But every time he tried to talk with any pretty thing,

They'd each refuse to speak to him without a wedding ring.

Well, this strapping Satyr lad, he set his eyes upon the world,

To sew his wild oats until he found the perfect girl.

A Merchant in Hashan looked just as cute as she could be,

And Rand put on his finest things, and spent a coin or three.

So once they met, since Rand had not a Sovereign to his name,

That Merchant girl just turned her heel and left him to his shame.

Well, this strapping Satyr lad, he set his eyes upon the world,

To sew his wild oats until he found the perfect girl.

In the forests of Eleusis, young Rand found a Druid fair,

And for a fleeting moment, thought he might just settle there.

But in her grove, and just as they would lay for the first time,

He found himself in bed against a mass of writhing vines.

Well, this strapping Satyr lad, he set his eyes upon the world,

To sew his wild oats until he found the perfect girl.

By now, the lad was weary, though he'd not give up so fast.

He'd make his way to Mhaldor, where he thought he would try last.

He only found one looker, but once she brought out the whip,

He ran off, noting Mhaldor as a place he ought to skip.

Well, this strapping Satyr lad, he set his eyes upon the world,

To sew his wild oats until he found the perfect girl.

Young Rand was so discouraged that his plans went so awry,

He trotted back to Cyrene with a heavy heart and sigh.

But suddenly, a different sight had caught his eye, and then...

...he thought he may as well just turn his eye to pretty men.

Well, this strapping Satyr lad, he learned a thing or two that day,

That some men like the ladyfolk, but smarter men are gay!