Ashtan's Tithe

By: Synbios Posted on: April 14, 2012

Ah, you are awake. And...lucky to be alive.

For a moment, I thought that the blade slipped and went through the nerves that controlled your vital functions. You may feel some form of numbness...and inability to move, though. I just severed a few nerves and tendons that control unnecessary things like arm and leg movement. Did you know that a single sharp scalpel saves the Vermiis Foundation thousands of gold a year for barbaric devices such as table restraints? Innovation in progress! But I do apologize for rambling on.

My peers tell me that talking to my donors is...unprofessional. What a load of humgii. I find that casual talk helps set the mood, especially for the momentous contribution that you are about to make for the glory of the Bastion. So, how was your morning? ...Oh, apologies for that. Looks like my hand slipped. For some reason, the way you said 'insane' reminded me of some of the unsavoury comments levied against me by those folks from the East. Ah well, looks like this will be a one-way conversation, since damaged vocal cords will take several months to heal, and it's regretful that we won't have the luxury of time.

Hmm, speaking of time, maybe I should offer a prayer to Lord Aeon. 'Bless us, O Holder of the Eternal Hourglass'...heh, hourglass. Now that figure reminds me of one of those War Witches. Shame she responds to my overtures with a punch to...ahem, where were we? Oh, did you need that? Well, I'll just place this kidney in this bowl. I might return it to you. Or not. Either way, you still have another one to spare. Ha! Get it?

Now, back to those excellent people from Shallam. Their fanaticism to their Te'Serra can be frightening. Imagine those Citadel folks - taking young and impressionable orphans of war, indoctrinating them into their rainbow-infested dogma of 'Creation' and 'Order'. At least here in the Bastion, the De Vermiis Orphanage takes good care of their young wards, filling their minds with hopes of Freedom and individuality. At least we don't pollute their mind with Te'Serran hogwash or throw them into stalagmites like those fogbreathers in Mhaldor. Speaking of which, these are some really strong bones. I hope you don't mind if I borrow one or ten of them for my experiments. You don't? Wonderful! I knew you wouldn't - or can't - say no to progress.

Alright, we're almost done. Hmm? This is a sterilized laboratory, so your eyes shouldn't be teary-eyed at all. Oh, it might be from the new order of alchemical bleach...wait, the scheduled order date was a week from now. Oh well, doesn't matter. You don't seem like the type to be afraid, anyway, not like the last two patients that I handled. Now, on to the final donation - the pineal gland. Did you know - even after all those centuries, pineal glands are still sought-after by our esteemed Karmic scholars? We could probably base our entire economy off these easy-to-find components...but you can't wear, eat, or build things using those...oh, sorry about that. Economics is a bit hard to explain, you know?

Now, I'm going to have to close and sew your eyes shut, alright? Brain matter and blood can be itchy to the eyes once I start opening up your skull. Just think happy thoughts from here on - think of the contribution you have made to our glorious Bastion! Think of how your sacrifice has made our Occultists stronger than ever before! Think of the nice young lady who made your transition from orphan to organ donor possible - and I must say that I always do my very best for my city. Hee hee!

And now...

...time...

...for your donation.